How I Avoid Real Life…

I suck at confrontation.

Like seriously….. I suck. I’m likely to hyperventilate and pretend to faint to avoid dealing with real life. But my immune system is such a piece of shit I usually don’t have to pretend because I’m always sick anyway.

Thanks for the lack of breast milk mom.
(I guess I really shouldn’t blame her, she had the chicken pox after I was born so she technically couldn’t breastfeed me because you know…. I’d die.)


How do I manage to avoid my real problems?

I blog, duh.

I also spend a lot of hours planning things I don’t actually plan on doing, doing things I’ll regret later, drinking until I can’t remember what day of the week it is, or chugging cold medicine because as stated before, I’m always fucking sick.

So what was today’s plan?

Step 1: Spend hours contemplating if you should eat that second chocolate chip muffin or go to the gym.

Step 2: Proceed to eat the second muffin and watch Mary Kate and Ashley movies from the early 2000s when life was wholesome and simple.

Step 3: Regret everything.

Step 4: Cry because I just mailed my rent…


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